When I catch myself, I do a 180

It's been a really long two weeks. Today was my third appointment with my doctor. It was allegedly some kind of turning point. He wanted to make sure I was "on board." I guess after reading my food log for 2 weeks and seeing that I'm actually listening to him, he realizes now that I'm on board. So maybe he's going to get more intense, which is kind of scary.

I've been reflecting over the past week how much I've changed within the last year and a half. When my Mom became a Weston A. Price chapter leader, I thought she had gone off her rocker. I thought there wasn't any way this kind of eating could be healthy, with all this fat. I was brainwashed by media and western medicine. I slowly started accepting it, little by little over the years. A year and a half ago, when I was without a job, I had no choice but to eat whatever she was cooking. I haven't turned back. But as I've said, I continued eating junk. Candy and coffee and alcohol. Overloading my body with toxins.

At first I was grossed out by real food. I mean, my Mom would be making stock with chicken heads. I was a prissy beauty school girl. Gross. When I first started eating it I thought everything was too greasy and gross. I slowly started dealing with it and being OK with it and eating it sometimes, but still eating the majority of my meals out. At the mall I worked at. Ugh. Talk about gross.

Now that I've fully given myself over, I can see the difference in my taste buds. When I go out to eat now, I notice that the food doesn't have any taste. We went to a diner for my Grandmother's birthday and I got grilled beef and vegetables. It literally had no taste. I dumped salt and pepper on it and even the salt and pepper had no taste. How can that be? It's fake. Fake food has no taste. Which is why they cover it up with MSG which causes neurological damage. Great. I'd rather just eat real food, thanks.

I told my doctor I'd like to be tested for food allergies. I only have been tested once in my life, when I was about 8 years old. Obviously my body has changed a lot in the last 20 years. He wants me to be more healed first. I complained that I still sleep half the day. He didn't seem too concerned. I guess it's normal.